06/08/2020

If I could survive domestic violence and remain this happy, you too can- Nigerian woman writes as she shares her story


A Nigerian businesswoman, Azubuike Chinenye, has used her life experience to warn women against the ills of staying in a bad marriage.
In a post shared on her Facebook page, Chinyere recounted how her once-happy marriage turned sour and how she suffered domestic violence all through the period she was married. She stated that she walked out of her marriage after her husband beat her to a state of coma. She fled from her matrimonial home with their three children and went to stay with her parents where she began to pick up the pieces of her life.
She added that she has forgiven her ex-husband and is so happy as a single mum. 
Her post reads
''She got married in the most painful way anyone can think of.
She ended up managing her situation just to have a happy home.
Her husband whom she met as a "growing man" and gave him her support. She watched him grow from self contain to 1bedroom to 3 bedroom flat and finally to their own duplex.
She watched him grow from a mere boat rider to a captain of a ship. She watched him grow from leggedy Benz to taxi, to Honda Bullet, to Toyota highlander, and to Benz C class. She watched her used to be a poor husband turn into a multi-millionaire. Unfortunately, things went sour. She started enduring domestic violence, abuse, infidelity, and maltreatment from her inlaws. She hid her tribulations from her family cos she didn't want them worried. She also was scared of society mocking her for having a failed marriage. She prayed, she fasted, she did vigils, she did the midnight heart to heart talk with her husband just to find out what went wrong but it got worse. She endured domestic violence both from the beatings with the use of a belt to insults and body shaming, use of a boiling ring, she even gets woken up at 1am to cook for him, she has slept one day and woke up by the bucket of water poured on her and the worst of it all? She gave birth via CS and was beaten for not taking her sister inlaws calls which resulted in her surgery site tearing open and she went into the theatre for another stitching. She has all the scars showing her survival. And the last straw was when she experienced a fatal abuse which landed her in a coma. But as a fighter, she fought it and survived coma. That was the end of her marriage. She ran to her parent's house with her 3 beautiful kids. She left when the 1st child was 3yrs and the twins were barely 10months old.
Her parents took her kids from her and asked her to go finish school which she did, she went for nysc and started life afresh doing every legit job she could think of just to raise money. 
She saw hell. She suffered. She entered into a dangerous depression and became suicidal. She even started resenting her kids and living a life of regret. She almost became mentally unstable but it took a pastor and her mother to save her. How? They introduced the power of FORGIVENESS. She tried her best to forgive her ex-husband and his family. It wasn't easy but she did it. She decided to focus on her future and her kid's future. Life started falling into place. She was hustling different businesses and finally became a School Director and a caterer.
She is not yet where she wants to be but she is in a happy place. Today she is with her kids, taking care of them and paying her bills ALONE without any support from anyone except her supportive family. The 1st picture was taken after she forgave her ex in 2015. The 2nd picture was taken in 2020, 5yrs later. 2019 her ex-family called her for reconciliation but she made them understand that she has forgiven them and bears no grudge but reconciliation is never possible. This is the summarised story of Azubuike Chinenye. When I tell you I have seen a lot in this life, pls believe me.  I am not here to speak ill of my ex-husband or his family but to make you understand that marriage didn't favor me. Life has thrown at me the status of a single mother which I wear with pride. If I could survive domestic violence and remain this happy, you too can. It's not easy. I won't even lie to you, being a single mother doing everything is not easy but the peace of mind and Happiness makes me not to feel anything.
Dear You reading this, anytime you feel like giving up, anytime you go depressed, pls visit my page and look at my picture.
If I can survive it, you can.
I am not a motivational speaker, I am only here sharing my story and my personal experience hoping that someone out there learns from it.
I am Azubuike Chinenye a domestic violence survivor and a business mogul''

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